I Left Because Of This...

Jaded

You stand corrected. Still you try to run your worthless mouth.

Telling me that I am the one who is fake, the one who is wrong. Well, I have some news for you, I don’t care.

Nothing you can say to me will make me go away, stop doing what I am doing, becoming who I want to become! Take your words, shove them right back down your throat. I don’t need to hear it, it only adds fuel to the fire that you can’t contain.

The truth hurts doesn’t it? It’s funny actually, how you thought you could tear me apart with what you say, when in reality you were only hurting yourself.

You are in a cage of your own lies, on display for the whole world to see.

You can’t hide.

I had the strength to fight back, to prove who I am. To prove the things I say and believe. Does that surprise you the most? I had the mind to move on from the shit, to push forward and forget what is behind.

This is who I am!

I know what’s right and what is wrong, so I ask..

Something on your mind?

Confessions don’t come cheap.

And now that I am gone, you come to me and say sorry. Something goes wrong, you want to be there for me, to help me…well

Save your sympathy.

I’ll go on alone.

Sorrow

I fell so hard.

Let’s look back on this. When I first seen you, I thought you were beyond amazing..I knew I had to have you. There was not a doubt in my mind that I was going to fall in love with you.

I gave you everything I possibly could. I let you into my heart, let you lead the way. Even gave you control. Just to show you how much you meant to me.

Everything was fine, until the your past came back to haunt our love.

I begged you not to leave, even when I was the one to walk away..but it’s funny how much things can change that quickly.

Now our time is over. I have changed who I am completely. I have left for good, still you find a way to come crawling back.. It’s crazy, really. How much you thought I would miss you, when it turns out how much you missed me.

Ha.

You thought you could be beat me, but in the end you found out what I am really made of..didn’t you?

Thought so.

I’ll never be who I was, don’t come back.
I’ll never love you again, shed your tears.

I shut you away, still you want to break through my walls..well it’s not happening sweetheart.

I’m in control now.

Welcome to the game.

What Lies Ahead

I don’t close my eyes to remember the past, I do it to dream of the future.

There is always a time to move on. No matter how broken and beaten you think you might be, something is waiting..

To fall.
To fail.
To hope.
To forget.

Those things, we all have to endure. At some point in our lives..it’s just how it’s meant to be. You just have to accept the fact that you are strong, that you have the will to make it through..and it will happen. That I promise you.

I have been torn apart. I have been shut down. Beyond all, I have been lost. So many moments in my life where my memories took the lead instead of going on and letting my heart decide what is right..But here I stand now. Ready to break out, to let everybody know who I am.

Patience.

You have to believe.
You have to open your eyes.

Listen to what I say.

I’m not crazy. I’m not insane.
I just have hope.

You will never fade, you will never be forgotten. You will haunt the very dreams that these critical people look to for comfort…you will make sure that they see how much they have actually failed. How much they regret..

Everything will be alright.

Just take my hand, I’ll guide you.

Surrender

There is a lot for you to say about me.
There are a lot of words that you can use to describe who I am.

But I know my faith, I know my hopes and dreams. I know what I am made of and I know what I am capable of doing. No matter what is being said around me, nothing will be able to bring me down…stop me from what I need to be.

Worthless.
Pathetic.
Liar.

A waste…

I have heard it all before, many times. All I can say is that’s your mistake..I may be a lot of things, but I will never be worthless, I will never be a pathetic waste of time.

So go ahead and waste your breath. There is nothing here for you. Go ahead and walk away. I will not be the one to pull you back, I don’t need it..or anything you have to offer.

Come and break me.

You will fail.

I am who I am.

Falling Down

I’d rather be blind of the past than to lose my future.
I’d rather live it up than set it down.
I’d rather be a leader than a follower.
I’d rather believe instead of dream.
I’d rather be me than anybody else and I plan on being me.

No matter what we decide, we will always have reason. We will always have a way to go. To get in and out.
There will be nothing to bring me down, nothing to keep me in chains because I know what I need to do to be me.

We can wonder all we want and waste our time, or we can step up and decide what is needed to be done for us..not for anybody else.

Don’t let ANYBODY say you can’t do what you are destined to do. Don’t let ANYBODY bring you down. They can talk all they want, they can hate all they want.

Don’t be a coward. Don’t run away.

Look at me.
Tell me what you see.

It does not matter what you see. I do not care what you see.

I am me and this is who I plan on being.

Don’t like it?

 Deal with it.

In Our Dreams Are Evil

There are so many things we need to realize. There are so many things we need.

We need life. We need to be able to rise up and face all challenges we have to face, either now or later we need to be prepared for the worst…because it’s yet to come.

When you think things can’t get any worse, think again. You will soon realize it can..and it will.

We need to start now. Get ahead while we can.

When everything starts breaking down, when you can’t take anymore, look up at the sky..think about your life and what you can do with it.  You are not alone, I am standing right here by your side, feeling your pain and living through your suffering.

We are not indestructible..but we could be.

As much as we think we are not, we are. We just let it all bring us down, let it all tear us apart.

As it may seem, we must know our dreams are never nightmares, just what we make this life out to be.

Don’t

Our light is never dark.
Our time is never over.

We have to make the stand. We have to make it now.

Stand back to back, face any enemy that comes to us, whether it’s thoughts or anything else…we can take control, we just need to know how to use it.

Please follow me. I will not let you down. I will guide you as you guide me.

Together we can win, we will win.

Mistakes can be made, regrets can be regrets, but soon enough…they will know, we will know.

Take my hand.

There’s nowhere left to hide.

Let’s take it on together.

Inspiration

As we all move on, we leave footsteps for people to follow. We think we have the lead, but they are so far ahead.

We vow to never fail, let nothing stand in our way of complete control..we are always wrong.

There is so much hate revolving in the air, so much pain.

It’s like a plague that is making us all lose control, go insane.

There is no place to hide from this, nowhere to go. We just have to stand and face the fact, face our problems. No matter how much we like to take over, get back what is ours, get what we deserve..

We can’t.

We can all try, we will all fail at some point, we will all want to give up.

Something still tells us to carry on. We have no idea why these things happen and we have no idea how, but all we do know is that it’s here. It’s time to start living how we want to.

At this point…

There is no treasure. There is no love. There is no hope. There is no game.

It is only our lives and what happens is all up to us.

We can find this treasure, this love and the hope, we just need to look a little bit deeper in ourselves…for what we really are and what we can be.

I can only say how much I want to be somebody better, I can only say how much I want to be different.

I just need to find what makes that so much more beautiful, so much more realistic instead of a dream.

These memories will move on, but you know…

I’ve never felt so alive before.

I’ve never felt so “on top of the world” as I do now.

Knowing one day it will all get better, something life changing that I will never forget.

We live for who we are, not what we are.

Can you take me for who I am? Can you take me for what I want to be?

There are so many tough choices, but if we don’t take the chances, we will never know.

It’s your decision, it’s your time, it’s your life.

Burn it down. Start over. Create.

There is nothing left, so what can we lose?

One Final Time

I spit you out because you are not needed.
I spit you out because you are not wanted.
I spit you out because you are not here.

There is no more pain, no more suffering, no more hate, no more anger and there is no more misery.

I’m done playing games, I’m done making my sacrifices.

All my memories will soon be erased and I will move on from what is left. I will not wait around here forever trying to make things happen. It’s finished, it’s over. No more will I keep my eyes open, no more will I hold out my arms.

So many times they have walked away. So many times they have said goodbye.

I don’t care anymore. I don’t need to either.

From now on I will live my life as I should, how I want to, not what I think it right but what I feel is right.

You can think, you can dream, you can reminisce and you can cry.

I will live.

Without those cares in my head, tearing me apart.

I rip it all down, set a flame, burn it until there are only ashes left.

Then as I stand there, looking over them only one thing will cross my mind…

Goodnight.

It’s my life.

I’m in control now.

Piece By Piece

All this pressure built up inside. All this weight baring down on me.

I don’t think I can last much longer. I don’t think I’m able to hold.

Inch by inch, piece by piece, minute by minute I am slowly falling apart…hoping you are here to catch me, put me together again.

You know, sometimes I wonder if I’m ever meant to be the one who’s on top of this world, sometimes I wonder if I am the one meant to be holding it all up.

Well I am here and as I go down I am waiting patiently for you to come and be my support, be the one to take me away from all this.

We have so many opportunities in this world, so many chances.

Will this be the one we take? Will this be the one we cherish forever?

I really don’t want to say goodbye anymore, I don’t want to watch you leave, walk away from me without a care.

If you look through my eyes, you will see.
If you put your hand on my heart, you will feel.

My love for you is beyond imaginable, beyond belief.

Will you ever notice? Will you ever be aware? Will you ever consume it?

Nights so lonely, night so cold..I need you there with me, I need you to be here when I need somebody to hold, to care for.

This situation never seems to change for me, never seems to get better…

But I am still here, still have faith that you will come.

I will hold this weight for you as long as I can, forever…waiting. The choice is up to you, what will you decide to do?

I will not give up, I will not fall down, I will not fail.

I cry your name.

Please come.

You’re my only way out.

This Fight

I’ve never felt this way before. I’ve never seen what I see now.

It’s my life and I can’t take it back, but I can make something new. All I need is is for you to say you can, you will, you want this too.

I’m still waiting for your call. It never comes..still staring at your picture.

I lay awake, nothing on my mind but full of thoughts. I can only dream of you, see you in another world than the one we have now. I want this more than anybody can know, more than anybody can say.

This 2nd world. It’s indescribable. There is nothing more than we could ever imagine. Nothing more than what we need.

You are still not here.

You still don’t tell me what I want to hear.

Listen to me. I need you. I need love. I need to be happy. I deserve it.

You are only wasted away, soiled into the seas wondering if your into this as much as I am. I hope you are.

I am different. I can prove that. I know I can. There is nothing more I want than to do that.

I know who I am and I want to show you the real me, not what you see on the outside, but what belongs in your heart, in your eyes, in your head.

Please, just allow me to show you.

It’s all I ask for, just that one chance.

To Say…

————

I never said goodbye. I want this misery to be over.

I can’t ask you these things. I don’t have the nerve, I don’t have the power.

Don’t walk away.

Let’s make this worth the wait.

I will bring you pleasure, I will bring you what you always needed…what we all need.

Feel my empathy.

Feel my heartbeat…

It’s all for you.